Divorce Day

Today is Divorce Day. . . I’ll be leaving for the court house in about 10 minutes. This whole process has gone very quickly. It seems like just yesterday that Brandy was sitting in the living room telling me she wanted to move out, but that she wanted to work on our marriage. I hope I’m done with her lies now that we will be divorced in an hour.

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Weekend Plans

Weekends fly by way too fast don’t they? I know it’s only Saturday morning, but the thought that the weekend ends tomorrow is fairly depressing. I thought I’d post an update here for my 2 readers as to what me and the boys will be up to this weekend.

nachosLast night was junk food and movie night. After I picked them up from camp, we came straight home for the festivities. They were already hungry so I let them start their appetizer of Dorito’s. While they were eating those, I warmed up the second course by microwaving some nacho cheese for some nachos. They were pretty hesitant to try it as they were afraid it would be too spicy. Luckily, I had the solution to that; dip the tortillas in some sour cream first then into the cheese. They seemed to really like that as we went through the first bowl of cheese in nothing flat. While bowl number 2 of the cheese was warming, I started the oven to get the pizza rolls going. We started to get full of the nachos right about the time the pizza rolls were done so we moved on to the 3rd course. I did mention that this was a movie night too right; well, we started off by finishing The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian; which we had started watching earlier in the week. After that movie was over, we watched Snow Buddies, which was more entertaining than I expected. After Snow buddies, they wanted to watch Twilight again. Somewhere in the middle of Snow Buddies, we moved on the the 4th and final course of ice cream. I figured they couldn’t possibly eat too much more so I gave each of them only 1 scoop. Boy was I wrong. They had that scoop gone before I got back to the couch with my bowl. The second bowl of ice cream started to take its toll on my stomach so I made that be the last course of dinner for the night. We made it about half way through Twilight before they got tired and were ready for bed. Maybe we will finish it tonight.

hootersTodays plans are kind of a hodge podge. I need to mow the lawn so i hope to get that out of the way about 9:30am. I was ready a couple hours ago, but I’m sure the neighbors wouldn’t appreciate the lawn mower at 5am. Parker has been asking me to take him out to eat at Hooters for a week now, so today will probably be the day. I’ve got a list of things I need to pick up at WalMart, so we’ll swing by there after lunch. Parker and Casey still have some report card money burning a hole in their pocket, so a trip to Toys R Us may be in order for today as well. All that should fill up today, but if there is still time and the weather holds out, I may try to squeeze in a bike ride to the park. That reminds me, I still need to find a brake solution for Parker’s bike. There are no foot brakes and he’s not quite big/strong enough to properly use the hand brakes. I worry about him relying on putting his feet on the ground to slow down.

TT RacesTomorrow is the day I’m really looking forward to, but it is all dependent on there being no rain. I haven’t told the boys my plans for tomorrow yet in case the rain does come and we don’t get to go. The TT races are coming to Peoria this weekend and should be a blast. I’ve decided to not tell them the plan until we are pulling into the track and they see what is going on. I hope they like the surprise. They both enjoy watching the motorcycle races on TV. I just hope they don’t decide to participate in these races when they get older, I would be too worried that they would get injured. I’m really looking forward to this as I haven’t been to these races in about 10 years.

That should be a pretty full weekend, I hope we are able to do it all. I’m sure Monday will be here all too quickly.

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Re-arrange the Fridge

The boys start a new Summer Day Camp tomorrow and have to start taking a lunch every day. We were making tomorrows lunch when I realized how pathetic my fridge looks. Keep in mind, I went grocery shopping today and it still looks this pathetic. In my defense, the boys are only with me tonight, Monday and Tuesday night this week. The bachelor-esqe look of my fridge prompted me to do a little re-organization of it’s contents. Here is my before picture (forgive me for the picture quality as my phone takes horrible pictures):
before-fridge1
After we finished making their lunch and me moving stuff out of drawers and onto shelves, here is what it looks like now:
after-fridge2
There is stuff on the top shelf in both pictures, the glare from the lights is just cloaking them. The top shelf has eggs, butter, olives and onion. I’m sure it will look like the before picture again in a couple days, but this realization may prompt me to get more refridgerated items during my next grocery excursion.

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Just Called to Say Goodnight

daisy_duck_on_phone_goodnightSo I was laying on the couch watching Wipeout while playing Zach in chess on my iPod when my phone rings. Caller id tells me that it is coming from my future ex-wifes house. I answer, not knowing if it will by Brandy or one of my kids calling. What I hear brings one of the biggest smiles to my face. “Dad, I just called to say goodnight.” I about melted when I heard Parker say that. I wanted to drive across town to give him a big bear hug but had to settle for our special handshake over the phone. Now, I’m laying on the couch with the window opened letting the cool breeze chill me. To fight the chill, I’m wrapped up in Parker’s favorite blanket. If I close my eyes, I can smell Parker in the blanket. Maybe I’ll dream about him tonight.

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About 1 month of Marriage left

infinitycenter-sAfter 7 years and 8 months of marriage, it will be coming to an end in about 1 more month. According to my wife, it was completely over back in February; but will not be over till the judge signs the papers next month. Speaking of the divorce papers, we have agreed on everything and have each signed the papers at the lawyers office. I wanted to fight for more time with the kids, but realized that the only thing that would accomplish would be to make us both spend more money on lawyers. I most likely wouldn’t have gotten any more time than what she proposed and any lawyer she got would probably convinced her to get more money out of me. As far as divorces go, I suppose I’m lucky in that I won’t be paying any weekly child support or alimony.

My son asked me tonight why I was still wearing my wedding ring. My answer was that I was still married and would wear it on that finger till I wasn’t married any more. At this point, I don’t know that I’ll be ready to take it off even when the divorce is final. I’m considering wearing it on my right hand till I’m ready to remove it. I know that at this point I should move on and just remove it, but that infinity symbol on it still means forever to me. I may get over her at some point and allow myself to move on, but I am just not there yet and don’t know when I will be. I’ve had a few people tell me that I need to see a counselor, Brandy included. I did for a little while, but the person I was talking to wanted to focus on ways to “save” the marriage, which is exactly what I wanted to hear. Once Brandy convinced me that even if I changed everything about me and my life in a manner that would make her happier, the marriage was still over; I stopped speaking to the counselor. No point in talking about ways to save the marriage when the other person has no ambition to do so and is probably dating someone else already.

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MY EX-WIFE THE PILOT

MY EX-WIFE THE PILOT

My ex-wife started taking flying lessons about the time our divorce started and she got her license shortly before our divorce was final, later that same year.

Yesterday afternoon I got a phone call, that she narrowly escaped injury in the aircraft she was piloting. Seems she was forced to make an emergency landing in Hamilton because of bad weather. Thank God the kids weren’t with her.

The FAA issued a preliminary report, citing pilot error: Shewas flying a single engine aircraft in IFR (instrument flight rating) conditions while only having obtained a VFR (visual flight rating).

The absence of a post-crash fire was likely due to insufficient fuel on board. No one on the ground was injured.

The photograph below was taken at the scene to show the extent of damage to her aircraft.

She was really lucky.

ex-wife-plane

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Quiet House vs. Noisy House

Normally, it would be a no brainer to pick between a noisy house or a quiet house. Most of you would pick the quiet house. I myself would have taken that option 4 months ago, but oh how times have changed. I’ve had the house to myself since Wednesday morning and the quietness was deafening. I spent a lot of time doing things around the house, but I didn’t realize how unhappy I was until I picked up my kids tonight. As soon as we got home, they both went off to play together. I didn’t join them, but I could hear them talking to each other and playing together. It was then that I realized that I was smiling for the first time all weekend. They went on playing and were running through the house; the racket they were making was therapeutic. It would have been the first time since Wednesday that I smiled, but I was able to see the boys Thursday and Friday. They had an awards ceremony at school on Thursday that I attended and Brandy brought them over Friday night so she could get more stuff from the house. I did smile both those times. Even now, the house is quiet; but I still have a smile on my face. I could walk upstairs at any point and just watch them sleep; which I may do a little later. So, I guess what I’m trying to say is that I would now pick a noisy house any time. Well, I’m rambling and I realize that I may not be making much sense in this post, so I think I will sign off.

Another update on my divorce proceedings coming soon.

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Cub Scout Camp-Out

campingThis years cub scout camp out for our pack was supposed to be tonight, but 5 inches of rain yesterday is putting a serious damper on those plans. I have already decided that spending the night in a tent tonight is out of the question. It’s supposed to get down to 40 degrees tonight and I’d rather stay indoors. I know, I’m a wimp. I prefer to say that I have an above average common sense ratio. They will still be having the raingutter regatta and a couple more activities, so I told the boys to get dressed in “play” clothes to get muddy. We’ll spend a couple hours out there this afternoon. I’m hoping the sun comes out for a while.

There is another camp-out scheduled at the Peoria Chiefs baseball field, but that is on a weekend that they are at their mom’s house. I would love to ask her to change weekends so we could go, but I’m not sure if I should since we are only starting this every other weekend schedule this weekend. I’ve still got a week before I have to order the tickets, maybe I’ll run it by Brandy to see what she says.

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Naive in Marriage

So I was watching this weeks episode of House tonight and found that I really identified with Chase. His relationship with his girlfriend is very similar to mine with my wife.

For those of you that don’t watch the show, Chase and Cameron are dating. Chase has decided that he knows that Cameron is the one for him and wants to spend the rest of his life with her. On the other hand, Cameron is looking toward life without Chase. When Chase stated his confidence in his feelings to her, she accused him of being naive. The second it was said, I knew that’s how I could be classified with my convictions in my marriage. I don’t think that being naive makes it any less right, it just makes it confusing.

I am absolutely sure that Brandy is the one for me and am sad that she has given up on me and our marriage. I’m sure that Brandy would call me naive, just like Chase. She can’t understand how I could still be so sure when she has moved on and is looking forward to life without me. I can’t understand how she could look to life after marriage before trying to work at the marriage with her spouse.

Oh man,there I go again, feeling sorry for myself and blaming her for giving up. It is hard to shake the feeling that she gave up without putting forth enough effort when you are still naive enough to think that you are still meant to be together; which we are.

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Happy Birthday Seth!

Happy Birthday Seth,

I hope you have a great day. I can’t believe that you turn 12 today. I know you are here in the house with me now, albeit still sleeping; but I wanted to get something down so I don’t forget this day. I don’t know how much interaction we’ll have in the coming years and this may be the last birthday I get to spend with you.

Today is your day, you get to make all the decisions. You already picked breakfast of corned beef hash and toast. I am now just waiting for you to wake up so I can make that for you. Lunch is apparently going to be Hooters, which definitely works for me too. ;-) Other than that, I don’t have anything else planned. I expect that once you open your presents from me and your brothers, you won’t want to do anything but play the Nintendo DS and Wii.

You’re Mom will pick you up early afternoon. As you’re pulling out of the driveway is always the exact moment that I start missing you; and I do stand at a window and watch as long as I can. I’m sure you will have fun with her tonight. As of now, you are planning on going to Kobe’s for dinner. It’s always fun watching them cook your food right in front of you. I hope you have a great time.

Well, I’m going to pick up the house a little now before any of you kids wake up. I hope you have a Happy Birthday and a great upcoming year. Remember to always be happy. That is my wish for you. If there is ever anything I can do to help make you happy, always know that I will.

Love,

Jason.

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